What it means to be gay

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Introduction

Gay, fag, queer. When many people hear these words, they think of them negatively. They believe that being gay is taboo, a sin, a mistake. Our sex-crazed society is to blame for this. Boys are supposed to have sex with girls and girls are supposed to have sex with boys, at least thats what most people swear by. Boys having sex with boys and girls having sex with girls is considered by many people to be nasty and sinister.

It is estimated that approximately 10% of the American population is gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender. It is widely believed that sexual orientation is pre-determined at birth and it cannot be changed. God makes some people gay and some people straight. Consider it balance; not of good and evil, but of straight and gay. Gays have always had a hard time being accepted in society. They have faced constant physical and verbal abuse and an alarming suicide rate. In fact, 46% of gay teens attempt suicide.

This e-book contains facts about gayness, advice for gay teens, and many resources that can be found online.Do my essay on What it means to be gay CHEAP !

Discovery

Its not about if youre gay, its about when you discover it.

Discovering that youre gay can be a very difficult experience. Typically, gay teens go through denial for periods over 6 months. They try to convince themselves that theyre straight and normal. Unfortunately for some, all the convincing in the world cannot change sexual orientation.

After the initial period of denial, depression often comes in to play. In most situations, gays act gay and their classmates abuse them because of it. That leads us to the next section.

Homophobia

Kids today are raised in a very homophobic society. Because of this, they feel they need condemn gayness to fit in with the crowd. People who act gay in school are considered outcasts and horny freaks.

Gays are abused in many different ways. One of the most common ways is verbal harassment. In verbal harassment, gay teens are imitated and mocked. Your presumed lifestyle is ruthlessly insulted. People come to the conclusion that you are gay even when you have not confessed it to anyone.

Physical harassment is the most dangerous of its kind. Heterosexuals are often driven to hurt homosexuals out of hate and ignorance. Physical harassment can range from a punch to a beating. Often, gay bashings (no matter how severe) are brought on by groups of people who equally hate gays. They do unimaginable things to prove their points and to make gays feel as miserable as possible.

Verbal abuse and physical abuse are demons that attack in similar ways. Verbal abuse can drive gay teens to bring harm upon themselves and physical abuse can have the same effect. If you allow homophobes to affect the way you feel about yourself, theyve won. There are two ways to fight against them and they must be used in conjunction to work. One way is to feel strong inside yourself. The other way is to get involved in the gay community and to communicate with other gay people (see the Resources section for information about how to do this online). The thing you shouldnt do is fight back physically or verbally. If you do this, the homophobes feel that they have won because they have gotten you angry; in a sense, they have achieved their goal.

Sexual Feelings

A large part of being gay is having sexual feelings towards people of the same sex. These feelings are sources of confusion for many gay teens. Gay males are consistently turned on (usually to the point of getting an erection) by other guys and are not turned on by girls. Its important to know that a short boner when seeing another guy with a boner doesnt really mean youre gay, in fact, it is sometimes a natural reaction. If youre gay male, you will have these feelings for long periods of time, and again, girls will not turn you on. The same philosophy applies for gay females. Lesbians will have sexual feelings and desires for other girls and not have a lot of sexual desires for guys.

Bisexuality can be very complicated. Bisexuals have feelings for people of their own sex as well as for people of the other sex. The feelings may vary. Some bisexuals have more sexual feelings for one sex than for the other sex.

No matter what kind of sexual feelings you have, it is important not to be scared off by them. Sex is part of every person whether theyre gay, bi or straight. Its also important to remember that you were born the way you are but sexual feelings can always shift later in life.

Gay Culture

Unlike anti-gay activists want you to believe, there is no definite gay culture, just like there is no definite straight culture. Gays are individuals with different attitudes and different levels of sexuality. There are sexually active gays and sexually conservative gays.

Anti-gay activists also want you to believe that being gay is all about sex. Its not. Being gay is about having the ability to love people of the same gender. Expressing that love can involve sex.

Gays are gaining an increasing amount of importance in society. They are slowly gaining respect from the general public. We are an established community with an extremely wide variety of members. Being part of this community is very important if youre gay. It makes you feel like youre not alone and youre not a deviant. For a list of online resources, see the Resources section below.

By Edgar Walker III

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